Trust, truth and communication

group of people sitting indoors

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It’s hard to trust much of what we see, hear, read or are presented with via the media as  the UK staggers wearily towards the forthcoming general election.

Truth and trust is a rarity. We have a prime minister, supported by members of the cabinet, who appear to be highly capable of making things up as they go along, claiming they are facts. Well they may be, but the chances are they’ve been massaged and manipulated to serve the purpose of getting the message across. I’ll be generous and say that some of them may be wrong because they’ve been incorrectly remembered or briefed, but that’s as far as my generosity is likely to go.

In most instances in this run up to the general election, it seems to be the output of the  prime minister which comes across as lacking in the trust department. He appears to be uncomfortably incapable of speaking with conviction or truth.

Time and again as he goes about electioneering, people around the country and the journalists who follow him, are asking questions which he deflects by ignoring them, changing the subject and blaming the mess we are in on other people and other political parties.

Mulling this stuff over in the wee small hours, I was reminded of some of the psychosynthesis/self-awareness training I have been  involved in delivering. We asked participants to do an exercise based on psychologist Virginia Satir’s Methods of Communication.

Taking on each of these roles in turn, so as to experience them, and with a thumbnail situation to role play within, they are

The Blamer, who shifts the onus as far away from his/herself by throwing blame on others

The Placator, who tries to please & doesn’t want to upset things

The Distractor, who changes the subject as fast as possible

The Computor, who is logical and factual but is also totally unemotional as he or she doles out the dry facts

The Leveller however is where it’s at. Levelling is about being honest, truthful, coming from what is known as your centre in psychoynthesis terms. Even if you’ve never heard of “the (your!) centre” before, you will have a sense of  what it means.

It means to be solid, honest, secure,  true and “right on” in what you’re saying and doing, to be authentic…..if you’re coming from this place, and are levelling (like speaking your own truth and admitting you don’t always know the answers to things), people will respect you and believe you. You will be credible because of your vulnerability and authenticity. These are some of the qualities that a good leader will express.

So now, what I’m doing every time a politician speaks in this dreary, dreadful, divisive Brexit-ridden election, is remembering to apply some of Virginia Satir’s wisdom to their style of commuication, and form my own opinion.

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